TOW the Confusion
by xxkatrina
Summary: Confusion takes its course as Joey and Chandler babysit Ben, upset Ross, and bump into a puzzled Monica and Rachel. [Oneshot]


"Uncle Chandler?" Ben said. "Do you want to watch TV with me and Uncle Joey?" Chandler turned his gaze to Ben, who was gazing at the TV.

"How did I get here?" Chandler said to himself aloud. He looked up at the ceiling and moaned in agony. "You might as well kill me now."

"Chandler, you okay?" Joey asked. He looked at Chandler oddly. Chandler flashed Joey a look of annoyance. He hopped off the chair he was sitting on. "Hey, wanna watch Baywatch?"

"Um, hello? Has it not yet occurred to you that there is a little boy in this room?" Chandler asked. He said sarcastically, "I'd love to watch Baywatch"!

"Alright!" Joey cheered, standing up. He motioned to grab the tape, but Chandler pulled him back. Joey looked up at Chandler, confused. "Dude, what are you doing? Don't you want to watch some girls run across the bay in" - Joey stopped and stared into blank space- "Oh! So that's why they call it 'baywatch'!"

Chandler slapped his forehead, frustrated. "Look, Joe. I'd love to, but if Ben says at least one word about us watching that to Ross...," Chandler started. "I will never live to see another day again!"

Joey smiled mischievously. "Not if we tell Ben to go to his room or promise never to tell," Joey said, brightening. Chandler remained still, thinking; leaving Joey to wait for his answer. Then Chandler grinned widely and jumped up with joy.

"We're gonna make a small kid watch Baywatch!" Chandler cheered in a sing-song tone, and popped the tape in the cassette player. "Scoot on over, Bennie-boy! 'Cause your Uncle Joester and I have a little surprise!"

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"Once again, you guys, I'm so grateful that you decided to baby-sit Ben today," Ross said, once he had arrived home from a speech.

"Oh, no need to thank us," Chandler said hurriedly. "It's not like we wanted to go or anything… Well, me and Joe will just get going now." Chandler and Joey tried to walk past Ross, but he stopped them.

"No, you guys. Why don't you two just stay here and hang out? I mean, it's not like you did anything bad while I was gone," Ross said. He smiled at Ben. "They didn't, right?"

Ben opened his mouth to say something, but Chandler put a hand over his mouth quickly. Chandler smiled up at Ross, trying his best not to act suspicious. "I… I'm just checking his…mouth," Chandler said. Of course, Ross didn't buy it. Ross looked at Chandler, then at Joey, then back at Chandler.

"Oh my God, what did you do?" Ross exploded. He tried to detach Chandler's hand from Ben's face. "Get. OFF!" But Chandler wouldn't budge. Finally, Ross got his hand off of Ben's face. "Now, Ben, what were you going to say?" Ben glanced up at Chandler and Joey, who were signaling and gesturing for him to not say anything behind Ross' back. Ross turned around, and they both stopped and smiled at him.

"Yes?" Joey asked. Ross eyed them suspiciously.

"We watched these girls on TV!" Ben announced, grinning widely. "Can I watch it again, Daddy? Please?" Ross turned around to face Chandler and Joey slowly.

"You didn't," Ross said, giving them a death-stare.

"Umm... technically, it isn't our fault," Joey said, forcing a smile.

"Yeah, he didn't have to watch it! Did ya, Ben? You wanted too, huh? And plus, now Ben is a real man," Chandler said, walking backwards. He shot his hands up defensively, then kneeled down in front of Ross. "Please don't hurt us." He hugged Ross' legs.

"C'mon, you guys. You know I'm not like that," Ross said, faking a smile. He turned around to Ben. "You stay right here, okay? Daddy and Uncle Joey and Uncle Chandler will be right back." He turned around to face his two confused friends. "Like I said, I'm nice. So…I'll give you a five second headstart. GO, GO, GO!"

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"Help us!" Chandler cried as he and Joey bumped into Monica and Rachel. They both came to an abrupt stop.

"Rach! Boy, are we glad to see you!" Joey said.

"Joey! Chandler!" a voice boomed. Monica and Rachel looked at each other, confused.

"Who was that? And what are you two doing? Running in the hallways from some evil witch?" Rachel asked. Monica and her cracked up laughing. Chandler stood behind Monica, while Joey stood fearfully behind Rachel. "What are you two doing!"

"Running away from the big scary man!" Chandler cried, as he pointed to a figure, Ross, who was storming down the hallway angrily. He smiled when he saw Monica and Rachel, but then when he saw Chandler and Joey behind them, his smile disappeared.

"Step away from the girls!" Ross commanded. He looked at Chandler, then at Joey. Chandler sighed, then stepped away from Monica.

"Okay, you caught me. Happy much?" Chandler said, looking at Ross like he was crazy. "You -You happy freak!"

"Seriously, you guys, what the hell is going on?" Monica asked. She looked at Rachel, who had the same confused expression as she did.

"Yeah, you guys! Ross, why are you chasing Joey and Chandler? And Chandler and Joey, why is Ross chasing you?" Rachel asked, looking at all of them as if they were crazy. She shook her head. "And Monica, where is Phoebe?" Monica shrugged.

"You said she was coming with you," Monica said.

"No...," Rachel said with clenched teeth, "I came with you."

Monica stared into blank space. "Oh. That explains a hell of a lot."

"Guys! Hey! That's where you all are!" Phoebe suddenly said. Everyone turned around and looked at Phoebe, who was panting. She had clearly been searching for them non-stop.

Ross looked at the ceiling, "Oh. My. God."

"Where were you, Monica?" Phoebe asked. "I thought you said I was coming with you?"

Monica shrugged. "Guess not," she said, her vision going downward. Ross grabbed Joey and Chandler by their shirts.

"Hey, you guys, want to know what my little Ben did while I was gone?" Ross asked Monica, Rachel, and Phoebe. They all nodded. "He watched Baywatch."

"Well, think of it as... Ben being a 'big boy' now," Rachel said, laughing. Ross smiled, leaving Chandler to make a look in disbelief.

"What?" Chandler said. "I told you that earlier and did I see any smiles! No, you dillhole!" He frowned. "I bet that's what Ben is watching right now, too. I bet that he's having the time of his life while I'm supposed to be in there watching with him!" Without another word, Chandler zoomed through the hallway, to Ross' room. Joey and Ross quickly followed behind him.

"Boys," Rachel said, rolling her eyes.

"Tell me about it," Phoebe said. "Oh, and aren't you supposed to be watching Chick Jr and Duck Jr, Rachel?"

"Pheebs, you were supposed to do that today," Rachel said, rolling her eyes. "I guess us girls are way off track today than usual, huh, you guys?"

Monica shrugged. "Well, why are we just standing in the hallway?" she asked, grinning. "Let's go watch-" her smile faded "-baywatch." All of the girls sighed, as they went into Ross' apartment. Surprisingly, they found Chandler and Joey arguing.

"You were the one who was supposed to watch Chick Jr and Duck Jr!" Chandler cried out, his hands on his face. "Oh my dear God! We left them all alone!" He looked at Ross. "If you hadn't called, we would be watching Baywatch!" Chandler and Joey disappeared out of the door and into the hallway, as fast as they could.

**IN JOEY & CHANDLER'S APARTMENT**

"Uh-oh."

"What?" Chandler asked eagerly. "What's 'uh-oh'!"

"T-T-Their gone!" Joey said, peering into the box. He picked it up and turned it around, upside-down. "They're not in here, Chandler!"

"Uh, uh… you look in the bathroom, and I'll… check the rooms!" Chandler said, as he threw the key on the counter. Without saying anything else, they both zoomed off to find Chick Jr and Duck Jr.

"CHANDLER!" Joey cried out. Thinking something might be wrong, Chandler turned around and ran into his door. He fell to the ground, grunting. He stood up and limped to the bathroom.

"What is it, Joey?" Chandler asked, annoyed.

"They're in the toilet!" Joey cried out frantically.

"They got flushed down in the toilet?" Chandler asked.

"No, they're in the toilet!" Joey said. He picked Chick Jr up and said to him, "You little bastard."

Chandler picked Duck Jr and said to him, "What were you two doing in there all by yourselves?" Chandler and Joey looked at each other with widened eyes.

"I think they need a time-out," Joey said. Chandler nodded.

"Let's leave 'em outside and let them think about what they did!" Chandler agreed. Outside of the apartment room, Joey closed the door behind him.

"Joey!" Chandler cried. Alarmed, Joey looked around. "Joey! You locked us outside!" Joey looked at the closed door, then at Chandler.

"I'm guessing that you're nice too and you'll give me a five second start…?" Joey asked. Chandler glared at him.

"Of course not!" Chandler said, and cried out angrily. He chased after the already-running Joey.


End file.
